Don't ask Don't tell

ok,  I'm going to upset some of my LBGT friends by this statement but,  I support Don't ask Don't tell,  not because I don't support Gay rights,  but because I believe if this law is knocked down there are going to be some people get hurt or even killed.  regardless of the reason why its in place,  I do feel it will keep a gay man or woman safe from idiots.  I don't think it should keep anybody out of the military but I do think the military needs to know the sexual orientation of somebody joining in order to keep them safe.  not all countries are tolerant and some of them are so far back in the dark ages that they would imprison, torture and/or kill somebody who did not abide by their laws.   and not to mention our own countrymen who are not tolerant and would resort to violence just because they can't accept somebody who is different than they are. 

If ones sexual orientation is known then they wouldnt be sent to a country that has laws strictly against homosexuality.  I read somewhere today that Obama basically said this same thing,  and for those of you that know me,  you know how it pains me to agree with that man.  I support equal rights for EVERYBODY, I also support the right to your own opinion without having to fear backlash for voicing it. 

well,  thats my opinion on that subject,  I sincerely hope that my LGBT friends out there do not get offended ,  but if that happens then so be it.  Just like my friends who are not gay rights supports don't agree with me on that subject.  I think any 2 human beings that love each other, and are of consensual age should be able to love each other and be married or not if they want.  they shouldnt have to deal with ignorance and hate and judgment,  whether you are a gay/lesbian couple who want to marry or you are a heterosexual couple that chooses not to be married but still live together.  and ANYBODY who is proven to be a loving, responsible parent should be able to adopt.  single, married, gay , straight, liberal or conservative.

and on the subject of bullying,  NOBODY should have to fear being themselves.  I think any form of bullying should be dealt with strongly,  and any parent that allows their child to bully others should have to be taken to a part of the world where they are the odd man out and see how it feels.  my children have been the victim of bullies before,  I think everybody has at one point.   instead of telling my children to retaliate I have always encouraged them to look deeper at that person,  show them a little compassion,  maybe the reason they are acting that way is because they are hurting inside and they want to hurt somebody else too.  for example,  when my oldest was in 3rd grade there was a much larger child that would not leave him alone,  he would seek my son out so often that even the principal saw it and tried to get the school board to remove the child,  but since the boy had an obvious mental problem they refused,  said it would set them up for a lawsuit.   later on in the year while at a parent/teacher meeting I had the chance to observe this bully and his mother,  and I understood where alot of his behavior came from.  that woman showed no interest in her child what so ever,  she didnt even stay for the entire meeting,  only about 5 min of it.  instead of being angry at that child I just wanted to give him a hug.   I also found out a few mos later that the boys father had been seriously ill for years and had died.  I had a long talk with my son about the home life that this little boy had and asked him to show him a little bit of compassion,  and try not to be angry at him.  the other boy eventually left my son alone because he was no longer to get a reaction out of him. 

I know alot of these bullies learn from their parents,  they teach their kids to hate what is different instead of being open.  and to be honest these people were raised the same way.  but it is possible to break that chain of behavior.  I was raised in a family where I got made fun of because I was different,  my biggest difference in our family?  for one thing I was smart and like to read, my aunts, cousins and even uncles made fun of me for this.  my body developed early,  I got made fun of for that.  my mother taught me that I was better than the neighborhood I grew up in and the family I grew up with,  so I was dubbed a "snob"  and yes,  I was waaaaaay better than the family I had,  they were drug dealers and users, criminals, wife beaters, child abusers, bigots and racists.   I cut all ties with 99% of them,  mainly because I NEVER want my children to have to be treated the way I was growing up.  even my grandmother refused to accept anybody who was different.  now she grew up in a way different time and that was actually the norm,  it doesnt excuse it but it does explain alot of it.  she wasnt a very happy person therefore that made her a not very nice person.  if you were one of her favorites then she was very nice,  I was fortunate to be on that list,  but if you were not one of her pets,  like my mom,  then you were talked about horribly, in front of whomever was around, I used to have to force myself not to tell her off when she would say bad things about my mother.  but my mom was very strict that we were to ALWAYS show our grandma respect,  whether she deserved it or not .  so actually out of respect to my mom,  I was always nice to her.  ironic huh?  the reason I was such a sweet granddaughter was because the daughter she didnt like and thought was a horrible parent taught me to be that way. 

this blog ended up being way longer than I expected.  but they usually do. *LOL*

hope everybody is enjoying fall break from school.  I was until about noon the first day and the first fight over the t.v. erupted.  this is my punishment for having kids so far apart in age,  they never agree on what to watch unless its family guy and I don't agree with allowing them to watch that.  that show offends me and thats almost impossible to do!  I guess I should do my blog more often so I don't write novels every few weeks huh?

hope everybody who reads this has a great weekend!